Funeral Dance

I danced the electric slide at a funeral today.

I presided at the funeral for the sister of one of my parishioners. The woman who died was only thirty-nine years old and her death was a shock. She is the mother of a seventeen year old son, the step-mother of two and step-grandmother of three. She was the youngest of five children. It was holy ground in the funeral home today as her sisters and brother, nieces and nephews paid tribute to her. The "remembrance" portion of the service went on for almost 40 minutes. Their words were tender and funny, heartfelt, and gospel-filled. They both celebrated her life and left space for their deep grief. We read scripture. I preached a shorter sermon than I 'd expected, because the family had said it all already.

And then we danced.

This fun-loving person had been a line dancing fanatic and so the nieces and nephews made the unanimous decision that she would want us to end this service with celebration. After the benediction, several of us got up front and danced to her newest favorite country song. Our performance was unimpressive; the niece in charge and I were the only ones that really knew the steps. But everyone smiled and laughed in the way you need to smile and laugh at such times. It was holy and right.

I drove away from there this afternoon thinking what you always think after a funeral for the young. The woman who died was exactly five years older than I (our birthdays are only 5 days apart). In many ways, our lives are so different. She was a grandma, after all! But in many ways our lives are also the same: living with the desire to love and be loved and to enjoy what life has to offer. I've been feeling pretty mopey lately; maybe this will remind me to love and savor each day that I am given. What would you do, if you knew you had only a few more years to live? Would you do something differently; or would you keep doing what you are doing today but remember what a blessing it all really is?

I sincerely hope to live long past my 40th birthday. But when people do gather to celebrate my life and grieve my death some day, I hope that it will be a time to celebrate love and relationships and life and the promises of God.

And I hope they dance.